Now I know how that sperm feels. The one that races past
millions of them to reach the egg first.
Off late my headlines feel the same. The layout is the egg. In the race
to win, each line kills the other to reach my boss’ inbox. If round 1 doesn’t
get approved, the second lot of lines does the same. Strangulate, suffocate
each other, and try to be better than the one behind it. The only difference is
that nothing really makes its way to his inbox. They are all a bunch of dead
sperms by the time they enter that space. Or they humbly settle on the underwear, the portfolio.
And suddenly, the boss' line emerges like a condom. A huge, long condom that stops my lines from making
it to the layout. And if that is not enough, sometimes there is a strawberry flavored
condom. It’s called the client’s line. The one who always says, “It’s nice but
could be like this…” Sugar coated way of pushing their line. Then there is a netted
condom, called the “management”. Every big line has to go through the big
bosses. In the process, obviously the line loses its value again. Then there is an RGB colored condom called the
art director who doesn’t want the line to affect his colors.
However, not every
condom is safe. Most of these condoms have an unnoticed slit that fucks up the layout.
What comes out eventually is a physically challenged or deformed ad that becomes
a laughing stock. The good lines die a silent death within these condoms. Once
in a blue moon, one of these semi-dead lines crawl out of the slit and manage
to appear on the layout. But by then, it’s not the same anymore. Where is my
line in all this mess? That good old sperm which was produced out of sheer love between the
writer and his thoughts? A condom only stops the natural process.It stops what can turn out to be something beautiful. No wonder why sex is most pleasurable without the
condom.
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